 But how do you choose? This is one of the most common questions I am asked by clients facing decisions - big and small. Choosing can be paralyzing. And while only they can answer this for themselves, I do have some ideas how in fact we can choose.
Data and gut. Data means the facts. The truth. Gut means your instincts. Your internal compass. Trusting it can be hard because it may mean bypassing logic. But I don’t want to get too caught up in definitions or which one to use with decision making. What I find really interesting is that we rarely allow ourselves the time to know what either facts or gut are telling us. We don’t allow ourselves time to reflect. Call Your Girlfriend is a podcast I absolutely LOVE and its first episode for 2018 included advice from amazing women like Sabrina Hersi Issa, an award-winning human rights technologist. Sabrina gave me one of the biggest “A-HAs” I’ve had in a while - which is to schedule a personal inventory day each month. If you know me, you know one of my mottos is “What’s scheduled gets done,” so clearly intentional reflection time for myself hasn’t been on my radar. But, better late than never! The concept of a personal inventory day is simple. You pick one day a month (Sabrina schedules hers on the day of her birthday - she was born on the 16th, so the 16th of the month is her day) to spend time with these four questions:
These questions may seem easy, but what we know is the easier the question, the more clarifying it can be. The point is to sit with these questions. To be honest with yourself. And, to allow this process to help you be intentional about your time. And, if you’re worrying that you don’t have a whole day to dedicate, how much time do you have? Anything is better than nothing. The truth is, without time for reflection, we are merely being reactive. Like everything, reflection is a choice. You can choose to make space to reflect - to find out the truth and listen to what your gut and your data are telling you. Let the next decision you make be the date of your own personal inventory day. Author Coach Lindsey Lathrop works with motivated people who want to make a change but feel stuck - stuck in their thinking, overwhelm, perfectionism, and imposter syndrome. She believes in "eating the frog," good socks, strong coffee, and paying it forward.  When I started my career after grad school, I served as an AmeriCorps volunteer at a non-profit in Burlington, VT that matched underserved youth with businesses, exposing students to different careers and giving them a way to gain work experience. It was awesome. In fact, our model for high school internships is still going strong in Vermont today!
Little did I know that each time I bought someone a cup of coffee to talk about how they could create an internship, I was one step closer to uncovering what I was meant to do. During these meetings, I would ask questions like: What do you love about what you do? What is your definition of success? What would you tell someone getting started in your career? I quickly became aware of just how much a person’s body language can tell you. In some cases, the person would become larger than life as they told me all the cool things they spend their time on and how excited they were to share this with a young person. And sometimes, I'd see the opposite as they’d shrink into themselves as though hiding from the truth that they wanted a career change. In those moments, I’d listen; mostly to their fear (“I’ve spent so much time and money, how can I change now?”) and how they felt misguided (“I didn’t realize it would be like this.”) Needless to say, I would end those exchanges asking who else at their business might be a good connection for a student! I share this not as my Coaching origin story, but rather to highlight how buying someone a cup of coffee and asking a few questions can have a life changing impact. Welcome to informational interviewing. If you’ve never heard of this, it basically means meeting up with someone you think has an interesting career and asking them about it. That’s it. In my opinion, this is the easiest way to learn more about a company, organization, industry, or project you are curious about. It may even lead to a tour, shadow, internship, job, or opportunity to volunteer or collaborate. If the first three sound like something you can only do in high school or college, know this: they are not. People of all ages can benefit tremendously from these experiences, especially in times when you are bored at work, looking for your next thing, or want to expand your professional network. “But I don’t have the time.” To that I say, you don’t have time NOT to. One of my clients challenged herself to do two 45 minute meetings per month. At the end of each meeting, she would ask “who else do you think I should talk to?” and “would you introduce me to them?” These two questions are key and having a personal introduction, even virtually, will greatly increase your chances of setting something up. How did that go for my client? She landed her new job way sooner than she thought. Here are three creative ways to reach out:
And, finally, if you’re not able to meet in person because of location or time, my suggestion is to send them a $5 gift card to a coffee shop right after you connect. Not sure which one? Pick a universal place like Starbucks. My gut tells me that $5 is well worth spending. Author Lindsey Lathrop works with motivated people who want to make a change but feel stuck - stuck in their thinking, stuck because of perfection paralysis and imposter syndrome, you name it. She understands the value of a solid support system, and that's what she's able to give her clients. Lindsey believes in "eating the frog," good socks, strong coffee, and paying it forward.  To talk about achieving our goals, we have to talk about keeping the bar low. Why? Because anyone who has achieved success will tell you, it not about the big leap. (Of course, we are made to feel this way.) It’s actually about all the tiny steps (and small decisions) that it takes to get momentum going. This especially comes in handy when you’ve lost your motivation.
I can't talk about keeping the bar low without taking about my dog, Jake. We think Jake is 15 years old. The facts: we adopted him in 2003 and he wasn't a puppy. He could be 17. #winningatlife What we noticed right away with Jake is that he puts in the least possible effort. Let's take the dog park. He will plant himself in the middle of the field, and as other dogs chase each other, Jake spins himself around barking and wagging his tail - as if he's ALSO in on the chase. But let's be honest, he really isn't. And while yes, this sounds like a life hack for having old joints, he's been doing this from day one. Other questions Jake seems to ask himself...Why swim when I can just lay in the water? Why NOT sleep ALL day? Alright, let's talk about humans and low bars. Because, unfortunately we can’t sleep all day. Keeping the bar low has helped me reboot SO many times in my life. Why? It helps me shift my mindset. Some examples of me lowering the bar: “I’ll be killing it if I get up everyday at 5:30am this week.” VS. “Get up at 5:30 one time this week.” “I’ll only be happy if I run 5 miles today.” VS. “I’ll be happy to get outside today for a half hour.” “Drink a gallon of water each day.” VS. “Bring your water bottle when you leave the house.” “I’ll be a good wife if I send a birthday card to all of our family this year.” VS. “Send cards to those you can and call/email/FB message the rest.” “Don’t buy coffee out this week.” VS. “Buy coffee 2x this week.” You get the picture. Every time I am down and/or have lost steam, I go back to setting the bar low. When I sit down to write out my low bar goals, sure, the voices of “Lindsey, you should know how to do this by now” or “Really?! This again?!” creep in. And then I feel really smart. Because, I remind myself that with setting the bar low: 1) I almost can’t fail because they are so achievable. 2) The achievement WILL make me feel better. 3) I almost always do more. This is the way I kick start myself. So, knowing emotions, people, other priorities will inevitably pop up AND knowing we’re human and will experience a plateau during a task or project – how do we keep up? Set a low bar and design with your “distractions” in mind. We design knowing we will need to build momentum - again. We design knowing we will need to boost our confidence – again. We design knowing we will have negative thoughts - again. It’s all going to be there. Again and again and again. For many of us, we are fueled by our achievements. We get a little dopamine boost every time we check something off. If you’re thinking to yourself “Only lazy people keep the bar low.” or “Small goals are too easy.” That second point IS The point. It’s harder NOT to meet these goals. (It’s like a frown...it takes MORE muscle to frown than to smile.) And, if you’re not getting stuff done anyway, think about how nice it’ll be to check a tiny thing off. It doesn’t have to be forever. In fact, it won’t be. Because small achievements + time = bigger achievements. Well, except for Jake. But he’s winning at life anyway. Author Lindsey Lathrop works with motivated people who want to make a change but feel stuck - stuck in their thinking, stuck because of perfection paralysis and imposter syndrome, you name it. She gets the value of a solid support system, and that's what she's able to give her clients. Lindsey believes in "eating the frog," good socks, strong coffee, and paying it forward.  “What?! People hire you to write their resume?” Yes, yes they do. And, their cover letters. And bios. Oh, and LinkedIn profiles. It’s more common than you may think. Before I go any further, I need to say this: Resume writers will not misrepresent your skills and experience. Instead they will help you produce a better document that will get you noticed by the right people. And, as we know, all good writing requires proofing and editing. Resumes are no different. If you’ve never hired a writer before, here are two approaches. Option 1 - Ghostwriter: This means the writer designs a resume layout and writes on your behalf, with your input throughout the process. Think of it this way: the writer completes 85% of the effort, you edit the content. This ensures accuracy and that your voice resonates throughout the document. Option 2: Editor-in-Chief: This means the writer gives you customized step-by-step instructions to improve your resume format and content. In this option, you perform 85% of the work while the writer focuses on editing and supporting your direction, focus, and content. This is a very hands-on service and is often for those who seek to polish their resume writing skills. It’s a somewhat cheaper option than ghostwriting. Other things to know: Hire a writer you want to work with. Most writers have no problem jumping on the phone to talk over what you’re looking for. Make sure it’s a good fit. After you’ve found your writer and discussed your needs, they should send you a timeline outlining when to expect your first draft, how many revisions you get for the price, and how they will be communicating with you throughout the process (phone, in-person, e-mail). Resume writers know how online career sites work. You will want to provide them with at least one job description so they can make sure your resume has the right keywords to make it through. Resume writing is collaborative. This is not a “set it and forget it” process. If you don’t have the time to dedicate to the process right now, don’t hire a writer. Like you, their time is valuable. It may not cost you as much as you think. And, you can spend your time doing stuff you actually enjoy…like kite surfing or reading. Once you have your snazzy resume, you can do all sorts of things, like… be your confident self when applying for jobs, use it to inform improvements on your LinkedIn profile, and when the time comes to update, you can DIY! Voilà! Hop on over to takeaimfromwithin.com/services to see what we can do for you! Author
|
Categories
All
Archives
March 2018
|
RSS Feed